The last few weeks have been ridiculously full...between birthdays, adoption stuff, Lily being in the process of getting a new leg (that is a post in and of itself!), marriage Bible study I'm co-teaching, etc.
My *desire* is to finish telling our newest son's story over the next few days...not making any promises on the timeline though!
So...back to his story!
The sweet little face was unforgettable...as was the video Emma saw of him on the internet.
Yet, my heart couldn't really get past the feeling of betrayal I had when I thought of bringing another child into our home.
Unbeknownst to me, Emma had waited a couple of weeks before showing him to me. The dreams she was having of him being in our family and the sick feeling in her stomach when she thought of him with someone else finally prompted her to tell me.
I've already explained my reaction...and that Kevin found himself unable to forget Jake.
Knowing he was with a different agency and seeing that he obviously had grabbed the hearts at least two in our family, I decided I would contact the agency and do my due diligence to show them I had tried to get his file and it just wasn't possible.
Only...it was. Sort of.
The agency was more than willing to transfer his file to our agency if: 1) our agency would receive it 2) the three families also interested in him (two with their agency and the one with another agency) all chose not to lock in his file.
Kevin asked me if I was concerned he'd be adopted by another family. My response? Not at all...seems like the perfect conditions for God to either throw the door wide open...or close it tightly and definitively shut.
And, that's what I needed. Clear direction that Jake was ours. I needed to...as I often say..."know that I know that I know."